Who Speaks for the Child Who Has No Say So in the Matter?

As a child of an alcoholic, and in recovery myself for the past 27 years, I’ve learned a few things. But, nothing saddens me more than to see parents liberally imbibe while their children look on, bewildered by the adults who after a few drinks no longer can role-model adult behavior.

I am troubled by the parents who take every child-related occasion and make it into a parent party? Break out the booze! Why do we see more beer cans, wine bottles, and cocktail glasses a children’s birthday parties than we do cupcakes and balloons? Does anyone ever stop to consider how the child may feel, and what the child sees? Do we ever stop to ponder the question—what does my child think? How does my alcohol use affect them?

Of course children can’t pick their parents; they are thrust into an environment at birth and two things will happen: either they will feel nurtured and thrive or they’ll wilt like week-old flowers when thrust into unpredictable alcogenic environments.

Women and wine have become as entwined as peanut butter and jelly. The booze industry has done a darn good job of taking what is a known carcinogenic and life zapper and morphed it into a seductive must have for millions of women.  Furthermore, advertisers have done a masterful job of inserting their subliminal marketing tactics into the minds of unsuspecting women having them believe, for real, that without the addition of alcohol, life won’t be fun, chic, or worth living.

While some moms party on, little do they realize that their children internalize everything they see. Too many women think if they are somehow physically present, that they are parenting, but most of us know that if you’re someone who is focused on wine, your kid’s needs can become the start of a constant headache as you desperately work to free yet another wedged cork out of the bottle.

Can we rethink the drink?

If you can’t forego the wine at a child’s birthday, and every evening when you get home from work…if you can’t attend a child’s sporting even without a solo cup or travel mug filled with an adult beverage—perhaps you’ve already crossed the line into early addiction. I can tell you from personal experience—it’s never easy to make hard changes, but it’s so worth the effort. As with most everything, it’s much easier to fix a small problem than to wait until it mushrooms into something large and unmanageable. If you don’t believe me, think of it this way—wouldn’t you rather have to lose only two pounds instead of ten?